I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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