But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
