I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
stop calling my apartment porn island.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
