My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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