it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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