Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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