She said her name was "party"
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
