operation harelip BJ is a go
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
