Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
They have beer where we have blood.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
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