her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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