I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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