you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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