it wasn't lemon gatorade
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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