Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Randomize
