I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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