that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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