Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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