Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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