We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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