only if we run a train.
done.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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