He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I party with great urgency now.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
