I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
