EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
