She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
