He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
