Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
