the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
