just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize