LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
