They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
