Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
where does the pee come out of this thing
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
