My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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