Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize