I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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