I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
