i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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