You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
