All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Houston, we have a squirter
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
