Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Floor bacon is actually really good
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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