gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
