best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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