We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
