Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize