Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
