We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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