Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
