Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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