she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize
