i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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