32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
