I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
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